Dear DOMAI
While
I was in college I worked Summers as a river guide for a whitewater
rafting company a couple hours drive from school. I spent my days
in the sun and on the water. Hard to believe they paid us for
that. These many years later I still go up to see those guys
every chance I get. The owners are great friends, but there is a
new crop of college aged guides each Spring.
By August it gets hot and muggy most days, so the cold mountain water
is refreshing during the day. Funny thing is that the night does not
really cool off much, so everyone does what they can to stay
cool. One of these hot August nights was just too much to bear,
but the full moon made the outpost bright and pretty in a way that
daylight could never match. Most of the guides are male, so the
handful of girls tended to hang close together as if protecting each
other from the testosterone filled boys. The girls took my wife
into their club as one of their own.
This night the girls decided the boys were having enough fun playing
macho games that they would go have their own fun. The "leader"
of the group was a tall girl called "Tree" who invited my wife to go
along. She looked at me as if asking permission, and I just waved
her on to go have fun. Tree looked at me then turned to my wife
to say, "Bring him along, too... he's mostly harmless."
Tree led the way as I pulled up the rear walking across the field,
behind the barn where the rafts are stored, to the gravel lot where the
buses were parked for the night. These buses are traditional
yellow school buses for carrying customers to and from the river with
the addition of a wooden platform on top to carry the rafts.
Tonight we would be stargazing from one of these bus top decks.
The five girls climbed the ladder to the top, followed by my wife and
finally me. I was last to the top and took in a view like none
other. Half the girls were already naked and the rest were on the way
to it. My wife, no shrinking violet, was following suit out of her
suit. I must have looked funny because one of the girls laughed, "Who
stepped on you, bullfrog?" apparently referring to my bugged out eyes
in surprise.
"Come on up and join us for some moon-bathing!" Tree exclaimed, pulling
me into the reality of the plan. My wife chimed in, "The girls
told me how they planned to beat the heat for the evening. I thought
you might not mind.". "Get with the plan and toss yours," said one of
the girls pointing to the pile of shorts, shirts, and swimsuits.
And I did as I was told.
The girls all stretched out on the platform as if on a deck by the pool
for some sun-bathing, but we were relaxing under the full moon and
stargazing instead. Someone had planned ahead and tied off a
garden hose with a spray nozzle to the deck which became a shower and
entertainment for the ladies to cool off and get a break from the
August heat. Each of them took turns holding the hose and rinsing
off in the spray. Watching as the young ladies cool off under the
spray was enough to make me forget the heat of the Summer. I lost
track of anything but the dancing ladies and laughter the simple joy
had produced as relief from the heat.
Tree is on a scholarship for volleyball. She is tall and
sometimes a little awkward in her movements as she stands a full six
feet barefoot. Under the water and naked to the Moon, she seemed
graceful as a ballerina. The movement of the others was fun to
watch with some small breasts some larger, one set even larger.
Nipples large and small, they all became excited under the cold
water. There was a mix of grooming as well; some choosing to "go
native" with a full bush, a couple neatly trimmed, and one girl who
shaved it clean. All the different shapes and sizes, short and
tall, athletic and trim, curvy and slim, but each just as womanly and
lovely as the next.
After they all got good and cooled off, they announced it was my turn
to get under the hose. They giggled jokes of shrinkage for my
benefit. But the girls were all just having fun while trying to
beat the Summer heat in their little hideaway.
For the next couple of hours we all stretched out under the stars and
moon taking occasional turns to cool off with the hose. I got the
chance to see each of the girls as they moved around and showered off
the sweat of the night. After midnight we rummaged through the
pile of clothes to find rightful owners and go back to the campground.
My wife mentioned that night with a wry smile knowing how much I had
enjoyed the entertainment of that full moon as we plan another trip to
the river soon.
Thanks,
Anthony
burghowitz [at] gmail.com
Letter To DOMAI
The women who find you and give you so much for your riches
and respect puts me in awe. Yes, they are naked, but I can see in their
tender, undefinable charm that you are giving them more than they can
thank you for. Your skill at putting them at ease and trust and
solvency shows in their ease. Their charm and expression is so magic,
so fun! They have the build of an angel, probably. They give me what so
few give--or would not--undivided attention, and sustained generosity
in what I want: the pure sight of God's lovely women. There is nothing
wrong with this, and everything right. I love my eternal companion
wife, and I love feeling privileged to also dance and run and play with
some of the world's most enchanting women, with the breasts God and
their parents gave but with the youth of plenty, and the sense to use
gentle mascara. Thank you all! Some of you have buck teeth! How
delightfully vulnerable. Your full young lips have made me catch my
breath for so long. What a feeling! Keep your natural
vulva's labia and please don't ever consider having them removed
for all the tea in China. Your curves are by God, and that is all I
have power to define that--the Fibonacci sequence of a galaxy and a
shell. Some of you have such skill in being yourself with the
world's camera and history glaring. But you belong to the future.
Eolake and your amazing team--these women say "I love you and thanks
for watching" with their everything and invited me! You invited me to
the summer solstice of a bunch of parties with regular people who seem
to be saying "I like you" with their curving hands so at ease. I
noticed, and that is what I give you. Their wispy hair and freckles:
these are asking 'does it look OK?' and I stammer, yes. I see your
wrinkles and moles and I marvel in the revelation of your soul that you
are sharing with me. I don't like pushy dames you say f...you with
their everything which God gave them with which to speak, and I
want to retch. What a waste! These women, your friends, are my
friends, and that has been a long time coming, and accepted. You all
have lyric in your being and you sing it, all different and all
valuable as dew. You water my heart with the knowledge "you've got it!"
I'm eating the most delicate cherries that I just grew and picked from
my yard now. Do you want some? They're red and kind of smooth, like the
hair of youth, and the shine of a happy eye.
I have more to write about how your women have blessed me unknown to
them, but I want Eolake to print this, so everyone will know.
Just Mark
Letter To DOMAI
Dear Domai.
This is my second letter I write to the website (my first appeared in
the newsletter’s foremost issue of 2011, where I discussed my
philosophies on female beauty, among other things). Now I return with
another article exploring my views on other relevant concepts, and some
great reading I wish to share. But first, the foreword...
Having started University last year for the first time (and the course
is going very well, in case you ask), I have learned the importance of
proper referencing in academic publication, and to compliment that, I
am granted access to some pretty vast academic databases for research.
My previous letter here did not reference my claims (although
justified, a lot of it was made up of my collective knowledge I have
accumulated over the years, and I can no longer remember where I read
which facts), so now, I will attempt to reference my future
correspondences as best as I can, starting with this one. For brevity’s
sake, I won’t include a full list of references here, but I’ve sent one
to Eolake with this letter. My main concern that I address in this
article are the so-called ‘beauty’ products presented by cosmetics
companies and the media, and how the implications they make are
damaging to ourselves, particularly to women, and that most of these
things ultimately do much more harm than good.
OK, here we go. The philosophies I set down in my previous letter still
stand, so if you haven’t done so already, I recommend reading it and
watching the documentary I linked in, just so you know where I’m coming
from.
Being at University, I am surrounded by many fashion-conscious young
ladies. This of course has made me think about my views and opinions in
direct context more than ever. I can’t help but notice just how much
preparation the girls must do just to go out with friends for a single
night, or just to walk around the flat even. Most, if not all of it,
seems profligate to me.
Where shall I start? Well, the make-up issue I addressed in my previous
letter. Like I said, I accept women for what they are underneath it
all, not for what they appear to be, and I encourage all women to be
more accepting of themselves rather than to cover up underneath sheets
of chemicals. Surely this is bad for them, both dermatologically and
psychologically. For me, all the make-up usage says they are
unsatisfied with their appearances. Yes, I know there is so much
pressure to look ‘attractive’ in today’s media, and that is difficult
to ignore, it cannot be denied, as it’s always in your face everywhere
you go, even on the refined privacy of the Internet. I still blame the
media for influencing unhealthy ways of thinking in today’s confused
youth, be it intentionally or otherwise (more on this later on). Like I
said in my previous letter, I consider women beautiful not just by
looks, but by their ways of thinking as well. Just to re-iterate: I
really enjoy seeing the great variety that women come in, but if they
all glam up using the same styles and the same products, then on the
outside they’re all very much the same to me. To women, I say this: do
not use make-up and be proud to display what nature gives you. The
variety is what makes you individually interesting, for me at least.
Next, I say, what is with the high-heeled footwear? I fail to see the
aesthetic appeal in them, and they just make the wearer clack around
with a very stiff and awkward gait. I have read in medical journals and
seen on medical documentaries that shoes like these only cause physical
problems. Basic physics says that the smaller the point of contact, the
more pressure it must support. All of the wearer’s weight is
concentrated on two pairs of small points, the toe and the heel tip,
rather than the whole foot. This position of course will tilt the body
forwards and upset the natural distribution of weight on the hips,
which help support the upper body. One documentary I saw informed a
group of teenage heel enthusiasts that for your feet, it’s like
supporting two, three, or even four times your own weight. Not only
that, but they may also cause shrinkage of the calf muscle (especially
dire since women place so much emphasis on their legs), growth
abnormalities (the larger the shoe, the wider the heel, but human feet
do not grow in this manner), and a lot of general toe discomfort (the
higher the heel, the more pressure is put on the toes, which are being
forced forwards and downwards into the toe box of the shoe, effectively
slowly crushing them).
Some of the sources I have read on this matter even state through
interviews with doctors that many women come to them with foot
discomfort from wearing heels, or even regular shoes that are the wrong
size. Some of these women even request to have their little toes
straightened, shaved down or even amputated so they can fit their feet
inside even narrower shoes. Is that what you call beautiful? Oh, and by
the way, all of the articles about foot health that I read drew
similarities with the ancient Chinese concept of foot-binding, now
wisely outlawed. It seems that people don’t understand the essential
practical functions and necessity of every part of their body (no
matter how small they are – no joke intended), and are willing to throw
them aside for the sake of fashion. That, or they don’t appreciate it
enough. I have a saying for situations like this: “Don’t mess with
things you don’t understand!” This goes back to what I said in my
previous letter about body modification being unattractive.
I’ve also seen the suggestion that high heeled shoes are worn to bring
women to a closer height with men, as I’m sure we’re all aware, men are
on average generally taller than women. I can see the reasoning behind
this. Throughout history, great height has been associated with power,
authority and charisma. For example, ancient Egyptian murals depict the
most important figure as the largest and position them as the first
figure on the left; the terracotta soldiers at Shi Huang’s tomb in
China ascend in height according to rank; and heroic figures in Old
Icelandic literature (like Sigurd, for example) are described as being
much taller than all others around them. So the association between
height and power seems to be universal alright. Being tall is good, I
agree. But while I view women to be just as equal as men in some
respects, my philosophies on accepting what nature gives you surpass
the desire to be tall. Again, I say stop trying to be something that
you’re not (and that goes for everyone, not just women; I know for a
fact that men also wear make-up and are just as much targets for the
cosmetic industry).
That’s enough about shoes. I’d like to talk a little bit now about body
shape in general, and I came across some good writings on bodily
attractiveness while preparing for one of my University assignments.
Over here in the West, it seems we prefer a low waist-to-hip ratio and
a low body-mass index in women (surmounting to a curvy figure and not
too heavy-set in relation to height), and for men it’s about a low
waist-to-chest ratio (the shape women seem to prefer is the ‘inverted
triangle’ – broad shoulders and a narrow waist). These indicators have
their affordances: for women they signify health and general fitness
(BMI) and fertility (WHR), and for men it’s physical strength (WCR). In
other cultures, the case is different. For example, in more isolated
and remote cultures, such as South African Zulus and Matsigenka
tribesmen in Peru, the most attractive female body is the opposite:
high BMI and WHR. This is because food is harder to come by in these
areas of the world, and disease is not so easily treated. Everything
must be earned the hard way, compared to us lazy Westerners who can get
anything anytime we want it. The largest women will be the healthiest,
because they will most likely be the best fed, and have the best chance
of producing healthy offspring. Just highlighting some cross-cultural
preferences there, for an interesting contrast.
I turn to an evolutionary viewpoint now. In other species of animals,
most individuals adopt the most effective mating strategy: serial
monogamy. A pair of animals will stay together for a few years to raise
some offspring, then leave and find someone else to attach to. There is
evidence that this happens in humans too, as in the west, the peak rate
of divorce happens within the first five years after marriage, surveys
on both sides of the Atlantic have shown. In evolutionary terms, our
purpose is to ensure the survival of our genes by passing them through
the generations by mating with the healthiest, most fertile members of
our species. This is where body shape comes in.
Testosterone and Oestradiol have their effects in men and women
respectively, and secondary sexual characteristics can provide us with
a gauge of someone’s fertility. Before we had DNA and fertility tests,
these were all we had to go on to judge our partner’s reproductive
ability. This next point I think is really interesting, but read it
carefully. I have read documents that suggest that women are more
susceptible to spotting features that represent high testosterone
levels in men during certain phases of their menstrual cycle. This
could mean that evolution has fine-tuned our sense of perception to
spot the people most suitable for reproductive success at the most
opportune times. Now, read the next paragraph carefully as well, for it
is among the best of the articles that I found.
A good recent document (and the one on my reference list that I would
recommend reading above all others) provides insight into why society
has made us find what is unnatural to be attractive – something Eolake
mentioned in the opening paragraph of the June 20th 2008 newsletter. A
dedicated study concerned analysing the body shapes and features of
centrefold models in Playboy Magazine. The idea was that this
particular magazine, being very well-known and widely read, would be
where most people look for an ‘attractive’ body, and the centrefold
photo is the cherry on the cake of the issue. Centrefold models were
analysed from issues from the year of first publication up to the
present century, and they found a tricolon of changes in body shape:
the body became slimmer; the bust became larger; and body hair became
less, and in many cases, nonexistent. And of course, we all know how
Playboy uses make-up, surgery and computers to ‘enhance’ the appearance
of their models, which only adds to the problem. The researchers
likened the ideal figure seen in Playboy Magazine to that of a Barbie
Doll, which is an unnatural figure. This is bad because this is what
young girls are being told is beautiful, and what they will aspire to
become like. But of course, they can’t because it is a figure
impossible to achieve, and it leads only to depression and low
self-esteem in women because they cannot look ‘beautiful’ and
‘attractive’. For men, this is what they are conditioned to look for in
women, which is damaging our refined evolutionary abilities to find the
most fertile partners. Furthermore, the researchers add that the
obsessive removal of body hair, especially in the pubic region, is
contributing to making youthful bodies seem attractive, facilitating
the politically incorrect topic of paedophilia. The Western world sees
paedophiles as one of its culturally hated enemies, judging from its
enthusiastic coverage of case files in the media; yet why does it
support a young body as the ideal of attraction? If we continue in this
way, it may genetically doom us, for all we are attracted to are
genetically, biologically, and even chronologically, inappropriate
targets.
This is why we need websites and organisations like DOMAI: to expose
audiences to a wide variety of healthy, natural female bodies, and to
show that there is no fixed ideal.
I’m getting quite near the end of my article now, and that last point
was intended to be the clincher. I know there’s a lot of stuff in this
article which is tough to swallow, but having read these sources and
understanding the points they’re getting at, I felt I needed to share
them with the right people who may not have access to the locations
where they may be found, while sticking to the copyright laws as much
as possible.
I will conclude by saying that the natural body must become the new
ideal. This is my preference, because as I have mentioned earlier,
variety is good. Let evolution guide our preferences. I am afraid I
have no exciting documentary to share this time, but I will provide a
link that caught my eye out of the hundreds of irrelevant messages that
Yahoo thinks appropriate to display on its pages, which is pertinent to
the subject, and is easy to read.
http://uk.lifestyle.yahoo.com/10-worst-female-health-habits-095153398.html
Anthony
References:
Diller, F. (2003). Love at First Sight? American Scientist, Volume 91, p 120-121.
Fischman, J., Jia-Rui Chong & Hotinski, R. (2000). Why We Fall in
Love. U.S. News & World Report, Vol. 128 Issue 5, p 42-48.
Fisher, H. (1994). The Nature of Romantic Love. The Journal of NIH Research, Vol. 6, p 59-64.
Luscombe, B. (2008). Heeling Power. Time, Vol. 172 Issue 15, p63-64.
Martin, G. N., Carlson, N. R. & Buskist, W. (2007). Psychology
(Third Edition). Edinburgh Gate, Harlow, Essex, CM20 2JE, England:
Pearson Education Limited.
McKinnell, J. (2012). Teetering on the Brink of Bad Health. Maclean’s, Vol. 125 Issue 2, p 58.
Meisler, J. D. (1996). Toward Optimal Health: The Experts Discuss Foot
Care. Journal of Women’s Health, Volume 7, Number 6, p 659-663.
Pond, C. M., Silvertown, J., Robinson, D., Skelton, P., Nettle, D.,
Grady, M. & Slapper, G. (2008). Darwin in the Mind. In J.
Silvertown (Ed.), 99% Ape: How Evolution Adds Up, (p 172 -181). London:
Natural History Museum.
Schick, V. R., Rima, B. N. & Calabrese, S. K. (2011). Evulvalution:
The Portrayal of Women’s External Genitalia and Physique across Time
and the Current Barbie Doll Ideals. Journal of Sex Research, 48 (1), p
74-81.
VOLSUNGSAGA (author and date unknown), translated by Byock, J. L. Published by Penguin Classics.
